Dating Paradise (Not!)
by sctwilightvampwolfgal
Summary: Blind dating was fun, right? These girls end up playing the pick a door game off of Youtube, and go on dates with the FMA guys.
1. Door Three: Gluttony And Ava

"Ava, your time's up!" My little sister yelled, entering our shared office.

"Just a few minutes, I'm playing that matchmaking game off of Youtube!" I yelled, watching as Claire rolled her eyes in response.

She took her whiny butt to Mom and Dad to complain about me.

"Door three, door three!" I blurted out in my excitement.

This time I'd get Alphonse Elric; I just knew it!

'Behind door number three is Gluttony; don't you feel lucky, ladies?' The screen announced, making me groan.

Was that a trick question?

Stupid internet.

The office began to shake, knocking down my anime, manga, and swim team trophies.

I arrived in a fancy hall with a tuxedo clad man.

"Hello, Ava." He announced; that was definately freaky. I had never met this annoying man before, and yes, he didn't have to say more than my name to annoy me.

Did Claire spike my water to steal my internet time again?

That always succeeded in knocking me out, and giving me wierd dreams.

This definately topped my list of my wierdest dreams.

"Ava, you have been given the chance of a lifetime to date Gluttony the humunculus!" He announced, cheerfully.

I longed to call him an idiot, but held the insult in.

He was just a screwed up fictional character of mine, after all.

"Show up here at nine o' clock on Friday for your prize date." He announced.

I came back to my senses, and found that I was still on the damn computer.

I didn't have a hangover, and my sister was still blubbering about my idiocy.

I got up, and marched to my room to sleep the wierdness away.

"You're up!" I shouted at my sister, who took that cue to gush about Justin Bieber, my bad it was Harry Styles now.

* * *

Friday seemed normal enough.

I woke up, dressed for school, and ate my mom's burnt breakfast.

My dad drove my sister and me to school while my sister blared One Direction.

I played Brothers by Vic Mignogna to drown out that awful pop music, and Claire complained that I only listened to one song.

I surely flunked all my classes for the day, because I drew Alphonse Elric over all my school work.

My sister walked over to the high school from the junior high to wait to get picked up with me, all the while talking about the awesomeness of Harry Styles.

Mom picked us up, already complaining of the vileness of her boss.

I felt compelled to get dressed up like a princess when we got home; I hated dressing up with a passion. I'm sure that it's a mutual hatred.

Claire stole the computer to look up stuff on the stupid crush of hers on that Harry guy.

I finished my dressing up in a dark blue dress with large, gold buttons going down from my collar to my navel. The dress was a little old fashioned, but it looked good on me. My dark brown hair was curled, and sank down a little past my chest. I wore dark brown button up boots as well. I wore make up that darkened my already dark green eyes to an almost midnight black color.

The room shook like the office had yesterday, and I appeared in front of that crazy host guy again.

He took my arm in his, and whispered, "We are not to blame for any consequences resulting from this date."

That one sentence dashed my hopes of suing his sorry ass.

"Bastard." I muttered.

"Don't talk that way around your lucky guy." He commanded.

I had always known that Gluttony ate a lot, but I didn't know that he was a penny pincher. (Lust never gave Gluttony any money.)

It made me sort of feel sorry for the fat humunculus, you know?

I stopped feeling sorry for him when he felt like the gourmet dinner wasn't enough, and he decided to eat me.

Doesn't it give you butterflies when your date eats you? Not.

I would now spend all eternity in his fake portal stomach. Joy!


	2. Door Fourteen: Roy Mustang And Rainy

I was half sprawled on my blue bed that was filled to the brim with my FMA plushies.

My pink laptop was across my lap; it's cover had Armstrong-esque sparkles all over it.

My favorite Roy Mustang plushie leaned on me as if for support.

My BFF, Ana, had gotten me started on those silly pick a door get a guy games.

I was currently clicking on one that was titled, Dating Paradise.

It claimed to have more choices, and judging by it's length, it did.

It was listed by a 'Edlynn Elric.'

That instantly made me think of the Ed is a girl fanfiction that thought made me giggle.

I clicked on the video, and decided on door fourteen.

I giggled hysterically once I saw that door number three had already been picked, and that that had been Gluttony's door.

'Door fourteen is Roy Mustang, the womanizer of Central.' The screen announced.

I let out the biggest fangirl squeal that I had ever done!

I clutched my Roy Mustang plushie to my chest, and tried to stifle my squeals before my parents rushed in to check up on me.

My bedroom shook, and plushie Roy and I ended up in a pretty brown hallway that was lit up by what appeared to be candles.

There was a dark haired man in a suit that had to have been tailored to fit him just right, standing right in front of me.

"Hi!" I spoke before he could.

"Hello, Rainy." He smiled in amusement as well as affectionately.

"What's your name?" I asked him politely even curtsying for good measure.

"It's Anderson." He answered, seeming surprized by my question.

"You must really like Roy then." He told me amiably, noticing my Roy plushie.

"Yeah; I'm really excited!" I told him, happily.

"That's a relief, because the last girl cussed me out." He chuckled.

I grinned by way of response.

"So when do I meet the real life Roy Mustang?" I couldn't help asking.

"This Friday." He told me, making me groan.

"That's three days away!" I whined, pulling an adorable pout that very few people could resist.

He nodded to show that he had heard me.

"Five o' clock." He informed me.

"I will only have two hours to get ready then!" I fretted.

I dropped back on to my bed, miraculously not falling on my laptop.

I kissed my Roy plushie on the cheek, beginning to get excited.

* * *

My week went by agonizingly slow.

I begged, and pleaded to go clothes shopping much to Ryan's amusement.

Ryan's my little brother.

He seemingly wanted to be a ninja Pokemon trainer when he grew up.

He would always be my little man, I quickly decided.

Mom bought me a sky blue dress that brought out the blue in my dark eyes.

My mom curled my dark hair, and did my make up on Friday.

"Why are you dressing up?" My mom asked me.

"Just felt like it." I answered her, nonchalantly.

Mom left my room, warning me not to sneak out.

I put on my Flamel necklace, and two silver stud earings.

I beamed when I felt the room start to shake.

Anderson stood by way of greeting in his pretty hall.

He took my arm, and led me to the connected restaurant.

"Don't sue." He whispered, making me laugh.

"You are The Giver Of Dreams, Anderson. I would never sue you." I told him, honestly.

He smiled back, and stopped by Roy's table.

I have to say that Roy Mustang looked hotter in real life than on a plushie or a screen of some sort.

I sat down across from him.

"I'm Roy Mustang." He introduced himself, forcing me to stifle a giggle.

Who didn't know Roy Mustang?

"I'm Rainy Collins, and I could pass as your female twin sister." I told him, grinning in a wide fangirl like way.

"I was just about to tell you that you were sexy, Rainy." He told me warmly, or was that me heating up?

"You are too." I told him while grinning.

"We make an odd pair; The Flame Alchemist and a girl named Rainy." He chuckled.

I joined in with his addictive laughter.

"Why did your parents name you Rainy?" He asked me curiously; everybody asked me that.

"Momma says that I was born on a rainy day, and that it's my good luck charm." I chimed in reply.

"It's a symbol of bad luck for me." Roy sighed, nearly making me sigh.

"We could be eachother's yin and yang," I flirted with him.

He paid for dinner, and took me to his house afterwards.

His house was simple, but beautiful. I fell in love with it on first sight.

We spent the night making love.

I'll spare you the private details.

Waking up in Roy Mustang's arms had to be one of the best feelings ever!

Anderson decided to send me back home not long after I woke up.

That made me almost hate Anderson.

Ryan had to be a sneaky son of a gun, didn't he?

He had been waiting in my room for me to come home.

"Mom! Dad! Sissy's dripping!" He yelled, leaving my room.

I ran to the bathroom to take a shower.

I was out of the shower within two minutes, and had wrapped my towel securely around my body.

I ran back to my room, and sat down on my bed.

Thankfully Mom and Dad didn't question it when they came to figure out why I was 'dripping.'


End file.
